Tuesday, November 6, 2012

The Rape Rhetoric of Campaign 2012

ORIGINALLY WRITTEN OCT 25, 2012

Here is the post that explains my rationale for what I'm doing here. Inside the Mind of an Undecided Voter.

So, it's Thursday. The big news continues to be the Mourdock comment about rape. I believe he probably did mean to say that the life that was conceived at conception is a gift from God like any other life even if it was created under heinous circumstances. But I guess when I look at the pattern, it's a little unsettling. Maybe he truly did say what he meant. Nobody knows. But patterns are often telling of a party's bent. Compound that with the fact that women still make 78 cents to the dollar of men, and there seems to still be a sense that women aren't valued. Don't get me wrong...I feel really imporant right now: I'm a female. I'm an undecided voter. I'm in the middle class. Everybody seems to want my vote.

The Republican Rape Quote Pattern
  • Rick Santorum (republican) about rape victims Jan 25, 2012: "...we have to make the best out of a bad situation. And I would make the argument that that (continuing the unwanted pregnancy) is making the best."
  • Todd Akin (republican) August 19, 2012: "If it's a legitimate rape, the female body has ways of shutting that whole thing down."
  • Richard Mourdock, October 23, 2012: "I came to realize life is that gift from God. I think that even when life begins in that horrible situation of rape, that it is something that God intended to happen."
Are all of these comments going to change my vote? Probably not for President and I wasn't going to vote for Mourdock anyway. Some of his paid volunteers already clued me in on some of the weirdness surrounding his campaign and I trust their judgment. Even more important, I didn't like the way he ran the campaign against Lugar. Disrespectful and nasty.
However, I am continually puzzled at why women won't stick up for women?
 Does the Republican Party Really Stand for Limited Government?
If you're a true Republican who believes in limited governmental control, how in the world would you allow the government to force a person to carry a pregnancy to term? If you let government decide that women don't have control over their reproduction, then that same government can decide to force women to have abortion. Ever heard of the infanticide that occurs in communist China?
Fair or unfair, the belief that life begins at conception and is God's Will, is part of a religious belief. We have separation of church and state. Let each woman decide whether she wants to carry a pregnancy to term. Its her body. Its her decision. She must live with the consequences, either way.

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Inside the Mind of a Female Undecided Voter

According to Rush Limbaugh, I must be crazy. He said (screamed) something like, Who are these lunatics who are undecided less than three weeks before the election? I've heard a similar rendition from the left. Well, let me explain it to them here instead of screaming at the radio/television.

I actually feel a great responsibility when voting. My grandfather always said, "I vote for the man, not the party." DIGRESSION ALERT:  No, he didn't say "person" he said "man" because in 1972 women were just starting to burn their bras and think they might be as smart as men.

Back in the late 90s, I had one of those "aha moments" that Oprah talks about. A colleague said she felt pressured to vote, like it was UnAmerican not to,  but she didn't really know who to vote for or much about the issues. As I delved deeper, it was apparent she didn't know anything about the issues. That's when I realized that some people actually just vote like they're picking a horse at the track. That's when I started championing "responsible voting" in my little circle of the world. If you're not going to take the time to digest information and be informed, please don't vote.

So, here's how my process works. I watch all of the debates. I listen to Limbaugh, Lash, some local right winger named Garrison, and NPR. I watch the "drive by media" as Limbaugh calls them...reporters on the network news. Most importantly, I read and research! For instance, Romney keeps talking about all the great things he did as Governor of Massachusetts. I will check the facts on that, but more importantly I will consider the SOURCE of the information. The source is key. I think it gets so complicated because there is just so damn much noise!

In the end, I will have devoted at least 40 hours to this process.

Here's the breakdown thus far inside my head.
Broad Societal Issues such as poverty, violence, public education, mental health and addiction, access to good medical care, about which I care deeply. I believe in the individual liberty but I also believe there is a balance between how well our society is doing as a whole. "There but for the grace of God, go I" and "We are only as strong as the weakest link." Our country works best when everyone is operating at their highest potential.

International Issues As our world grows smaller, we are all very entwined. It's complex yet simple at the same time. The bigger question to me is this: Do we believe our country has the responsibility as a "super power" to stick up for the weak who are being tortured by tyrants, to champion freedom and liberty, to promote democracy and relgious freedom, and to provide humanitarian aid to those less fortunate? Or do we believe that we need to tend to our own backyard and intervene only when our security and/or the security of our allies is at risk? On the one hand, isn't it our prime responsibility to take care of ourselves first? On the other hand, how can we morally sit back and do nothing when people are being tortured...especially people to whom we have given hope and watched them courageously stand up to dictators and/or religious zealots who want to quash their passion for freedom. If we let tyrants take over, doesn't that put our security at risk?

Tactically it's complicated. Strategically, it's simple: what do we see as our role in the world?

Ideological Issues I'm not sure that's the correct term, but these are things such as pro-choice/pro-life, separation of church and state, equal rights, environmentalism/energy policy, etc.

"It's the economy, stupid"  The Clinton battle cry during his campaign to defeat incumbent George H.W. Bush during the 1992 election, actually is the core of each of three categories I listed previously. Our country has to be strong economically to help us deal efficiently and compassionately with the societel issues, such as poverty, violence, mental health and addiction, etc. In the 21st century, economic power equals national security (this is one issue where I concur with Ron Paul). Internationally, whether it's diplomatic relations, national security, or respect, it's about economic power. The country who is the most economically sound ultimately has the most security. That power can be used for good or for evil. Economic strength is less important to some of the ideological issues, but still matters in the sense that I believe a society has more freedom to discuss these issues in a rational way if they aren't worried about going bankrupt.

So, I will be busy the next few weeks. I am thankful each and every day that I was born in the land of the free!

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Have botox and boob jobs ruined the curve?

A segment on the Today show prompted me to post this short story I wrote about cosmetic procedures. The segment was about the new wave/acceptance of seniors as models. The lead-in was about this spunky 90-year-old lady who is the face of MAC cosmetics. Then, they went to a 72-year-old model being interviewed by Anne Curry. I was all for the "concept" but as this model, Valerie Ramsey, smiled through her bleached white teeth as she talked about how it's the power of confidence and a positive outlook that defines beauty, I couldn't help but notice her "botoxed" forehead (if you watch the video...click on the link below...you'll notice how it doesn't move...look at her neck...it's a dead giveaway). Even the psychologist they used in the piece, Vivian Diller, looked  "botoxed" (like how I've used botox as verb here?)
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/46745179#46745179

I'm not saying its the botox that's a problem, necessarily, it's about being disingenuous. And Anne Curry didn't even ask the question we were all thinking, "So, have you had any work done?" Below is my take, here in the middle....

The value of plastic surgery
I always thought of plastic surgery as a way to level the playing field and correct some of nature’s errors…think the pictures of kids wth cleft pallets. The whole point is to fix something that nature messed up so that person wouldn’t stand out--so people could see what was important—what was on the inside. Or, to correct injuries from an accident or a fire so the person would blend in and look “normal” again. Then there was plastic surgery for the movie stars---the hideous face lifts to defy aging.

Enter the 90s…boob jobs and Botox abound.

I remember one friend telling me she was so flat that having breast implants was simply a way to make her look more “normal.” Hmmm…that fit my plastic surgery argument. She really was flat and her surgery took her to a full B cup…we’re not talking Dolly Parton breasts. Then, another friend had her breast enhancement surgery…using the same argument except it was because her breasts didn’t match her frame...huh(?) She came out a D cup even though she attempted to stuff herself into C cup bras for at least two years to rationalize the size of her breasts.

I remember giving my feminazi (that was my husband’s endearing term he had for me that he ripped off from Rush LimbaughJ) speech about using our brains and it’s what’s on the inside that counts. I proceeded with a discussion about ruining the curve. “You are changing what normal looks like.”

Indeed, that’s what happened. I recall watching a rerun of the 70s hit Charlie’s Angels one night as we were flipping through channels. The three most beautiful and revered women of the 70s were on a yacht wearing their bikinis. I was mentioning to my children how this was a popular show when I was growing up and my son said, “They look really weird.” I explained those were the hair styles back then but soon realized that’s not what he meant. They looked like boys wearing bikinis. Indeed, I realized they did look weird. The silicone and saline implants had ruined the curve. They had changed "normal"

Fast forward to the turn of the century. Botox, a drug originally used to treat patients who suffered from spinal torticollis, was found to have an appealing effect of “freezing” the forehead and removing wrinkles. As the baby boomers aged, they took the bait. Botox parties, a quick injection at the derm’s office. Whoala…10 years of wrinkles gone! How vain. How sad for these women to be so fixated on their appearance and trying to recoup their lost youth that they would pay $600 and endure the pain of injections to their face!!! Ick.

My Botox Experience
Then a funny thing happened. I had agreed to be a mystery shopper at a plastic surgeon’s office. I thought I was going for a consult and was to evaluate the check-in process, information I was given, helpfulness and demeanor of the staff. Just about an hour before my appointment, I found out from the person who had arranged the mystery shop that I was actually supposed to get the Botox injection AND filler for my Parentheses (those are the lines on each side of our mouth) and throw in a lip injection too, if you want.

I was horrified. But I’m a pretty committed type. The ball was in motion and the person arranging the project was a close friend. This was her career and I felt I needed to follow through. I bypassed the lip injection but went ahead with Botox and the filler.

It was uncomfortable. I still shiver when I think of the shot going into my forehead and my face (it’s not normal to let a sharp object penetrate such sensitive skin for a non-medical reason). But here’s what happened.

All the sudden people started asking me if I had gotten a new hair cut. Had I started working out? Had I lost weight? I noticed everyone was so nice to me. It’s like that commercial for juvaderm…everyone will notice but no one will know. I confided to two of my friends about the mystery shop after they commented on how I great I looked. They were stunned, but impressed with the results.

So, here I am stuck in the middle. Is cosmetic surgery for the vain and the shallow or is it just the new normal? And don't get me started on the teeth bleaching! I'll save that for later!

Monday, February 6, 2012

Wake Up America!

While millions of Americans were watching the Super Bowl, feeling patriotic listening to Kelly Clarkson's stunning performance of our National Anthem (with the 45 selected members from the Indianapolis Children's Choir singing back-up), and high-fiving ourselves with the iconic "make my day" voice of Clint Eastwood telling us America is ready to kick ass again, my dad was writing this article about the newest assault on our freedom. 


We, the people...the government is WE THE PEOPLE. If you are an American, if you love liberty, democracy, and believe in The Constitution of the United States of America, take the time to read this article and then send it to everyone you know. FINALLY, if you agree that these laws jeopardize the foundation of this country, send an email to your local newspaper and to your congressional representatives. I think it was Ben Franklin who said (paraphrased), "Those who are willing to give to up liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither..."

                                                                Let  Freedom Ring
by Darell J. Smith, M.D. (a.k.a. my dad)
                It is a great comfort to know that we live in a country where we are protected from the power structure of our government, and that individual liberty is the foundation on which our constitution was built.   Recent events should awaken us to the fact that we can ill afford to take these protections for granted any longer. 

                Following the shock of 911, a bill was hastily cobbled together, and passed by Congress with little debate or opposition.  It was called the ‘The Patriot act”.  It was 375 pages long, and some of our fearless leaders acknowledged they had never read it, but who could be against a bill so named without becoming labeled as unpatriotic.  Many of the provisions in the bill were necessary in order to deal with this new threat of terrorism; however it turned out to be rife with other provisions that trampled on our traditional guarantees of freedom.   It allowed for indefinite detention (a much more benign word than permanent imprisonment). It legalized listening in on our phone conversations and intercepting our email messages.  It gave our government the right to secretly search our homes, offices or places of worship.  That thing about going to a judge and presenting a rational reason to do that stuff was time consuming.  Besides, we shouldn’t need to give those towel head jihadists any rights so who needs a warrant to root them out.   

Guantanamo Bay was soon populated as people from all over were gathered up if suspected of engaging in or supporting terrorist activities.  It soon became apparent that many of these “detentions” were unwarranted; although it is true that many were bad guys.   Meanwhile, a few thousand miles away some families were desperately looking for their husbands,  sons,  and fathers who  had suddenly disappeared.   Well, that was sad, but it was a matter of national security.   The “detainees” were labeled as “enemy combatants” rather than prisoners of war with the rationale that as such they were not subject to the rules regarding the treatment of prisoners as prescribed in the Geneva Convention of which we were signatories.   With the realization that we were under attack by a group of Muslim fanatics, gathering intelligence from those thought to be terrorists became important.  Our CIA had the solution, which they called “enhanced interrogation” techniques which seemed similar to what was described in the Geneva documents as torture.   There were some questions raised as to the usefulness of this practice and some people even expressed some ethical concerns especially since the U S had been criticizing such behaviors by other countries for years.  The CIA, always innovative, took a page from our corporations and began to outsource these interrogations to other countries who  had a great deal of experience with this sort of thing and could enhance the questioning  even  more and they  wouldn’t be forced to deal with a bunch of left wing softies.  They called this process “rendition”, a term I found puzzling, but it sounded much better than exporting for torture.

The term, enemy combatant was never clearly defined, but most assumed it referred to foreign enemies.   Subsequent events suggest that it may have become more inclusive for it would not be long until a whistle blower revealed the existence of a secret room in which a super computer was installed to monitor the calls of all U.S. citizens and others.  There was some resistance to this program which was labeled “warrantless wiretapping” as the public finally thought this was going too far.  Conversely, when our president proudly announced that he had ordered a successful execution of Anwar al- Awlaki who happened to be an American citizen  there was  an upswing  in the polls  for Mr. Obama., and only a few questioned the wisdom or legality of this act.  There seems little doubt that this person was an enemy of the United States, and that he deserved to forfeit his life for all the deaths to which he had contributed. 

The larger r question however should b e:  Do we want to cede the power of life and death to our President?   Should we no matter how dire the circumstances allow our president or anyone else to replace our judicial system, and  deny anyone one of our most basic protections - the right of trial by  jury?  The answers should be obvious to any freedom loving citizen.   I recall a time when exposure of the CIA’s plans to assassinate foreign leaders was met with scorn by our citizens, now we see it praised even when it involves a citizen of the United States.  The bottom line for me is that I see nothing patriotic in the Patriot Act, and was discouraged to hear that it had recently been renewed with  little fanfare or public outcry.

Little did I realize that the worse assault on our freedoms was yet to come.  I had reassured myself that the patriot act would eventually be repealed, and that President Obama might yet be able to carry out his plan to try those Gitmo residents in civilian courts and close Gitmo as he had promised during his campaign, if only democrats could once again come to control congress.    My hopes were dashed a few days ago when I read an article in The Nation by Alexander Cochburn titled: “The Man Who Shot Habeas Corpus”.   The reasons why this subject was news to me were pointed out in the  first paragraph as he explained that the National Defense Appropriations Act   which contained this shocking bit of legislation had been signed into law on Friday of New Year’s weekend  --  a time not likely to receive much journalistic attention.   He continues with the following statement:

“…….this time snugly ensconced in the NDAA came ratification by legal statute of the exposure  of U S citizens to  arbitrary arrest without subsequent benefit  of counsel  and to possible torture  and imprisonment.  Goodbye Bye, Habeas Corpus.”

My sense of disappointment was complete as I read on and found that Senator Carl Levin, the kindly appearing democrat, who wore his spectacles on the tip of his nose a la Ben Franklin, was a cosponsor of this abomination.  This law not only authorizes, but requires the military to arrest anyone suspected of supporting terrorists or “associated forces” (whatever that means).   Note the word suspected.  There needs to be no proof, and if such did exist it would be of no consequence since no hearings or sentencing would be required.   It appears that one would simply be picked up and and jailed.   The principle of Habeas Corpus literally translated means produce the body.  In legal terms it means those charged with crimes to have a hearing in which probable cause exists to justify their incarceration.  It stems from old English common law established by King James in 1679.  One of the few criticisms historians have launched against Abraham Lincoln was his suspension of Habeas corpus during the civil war.  He defied the Supreme Court when they declared his acts unconstitutional.  But our government of the people, by the people and for the people has decided this Habeas Corpus thing is making it too difficult to catch the bad guys.  I guess it would be easier to just round up a bunch of people, lock them up and sort it out later if you ever got time to do it.

                The other scary part about this thing is the fact that the military (Army, Navy and Marines) are given the power to arrest citizens and to bypass the judicial system.  This appears to be in direct conflict with the federal Posse Comitatus Act of 1878 which makes it a crime to use the military as a domestic police force, except in certain extreme emergencies.   This makes a lot of sense to me.  I don’t believe I would be comfortable to see armed soldiers policing our streets as is routine in many totalitarian nations.  Can you say: military junta? 

                One might ask a very logical question as to how President  Obama, who taught constitutional law, could bring himself to sign such a bill into law.  As a matter of fact, he had initially threatened to veto it, but changed his mind after it was modified to give him the power to countermand detentions when he saw fit.  This did not make sense to me as he is the commander in chief and I would think he would have already had that power.   Curiously he also added a signing statement in the manner of George Bush in which he expressed reservations about the wisdom of this bill and promised that he would never use these powers against American citizens.  In that case one wonders why he signed the damn thing.  The signing statement does not have the force of law, and the law will be in force unless repealed long after he is gone.  Was he being pressured somehow, did he just wimp out as some have accused him of doing with other issues or did his veto pen run out of ink?  The paradox of this whole situation is that we are being told we must give up liberty in order to save it.  The question is will there be any left to save.

                If this all sounds paranoid, I guess it is, but just remember that just because you are paranoid doesn’t necessarily mean they are not out to get you.   When I read George Orwell’s book many years ago,  I thought it was far out, but now we see technologies  developing that are more than capable of carrying out the outrageous scenarios he described in his book of science fiction.  This will require a degree of vigilance never required to safeguard our freedoms.   The thing that worries me even more, than the incidents I have described is the lack of apparent concern about what has happened to us since 911.  There has been hardly a whimper about the passage of NDAA from our media whom we trust to keep our politicians honest, but then they don’t do much reporting on anything these days unless   it doesn’t require them to leave their offices.   If it is true that the “only thing that allows tyranny to triumph is for good men to do nothing”, we are in some danger for I see little evidence that much is being  done.  I know we still have good men and I hope they will do something.

                I do plan to send this epistle via email, so if someone is out there monitoring this, please understand that I am a law abiding patriotic citizen, have nothing to do with any subversive or jihadist organizations, and Iam also a weak-kneed coward who would tell you anything you wanted to hear with even the threat of enhanced interrogation.  So please don’t send me to the gulag.


I guess God had more important prayers to answer Super Bowl Sunday

This is a post I have been meaning to write, but Tom Brady's wife, Giselle (sp?) gave me the perfect opportunity to vent about this subject. Wasted prayers!

Her tweet earlier this week (seems long for a tweet): "This sunday will be a really important day in my husband's life. He and his team worked so hard to get to this point and now they need us more than ever to send them positive energy so they can fulfill their dream of winning this super bowl...
So I kindly ask all of you to join me on this positive chain and pray for him, so he can feel confident, healthy and strong. Envision him happy and fulfilled experiencing with his team a victory this sunday.
Thank you for your love and support. Love, G :)"

I'm not the most religious person on the planet, some might call me an agnostic, some might even call me an atheist, as we all get very hung up on labels it seems. Here is my question for all of you "God fearing Christians" since you're closer to the subject than I am...When God is listening to the billions of prayers each day, do you think he/she puts winning the Super Bowl at the top of the list? Even better, do  you think God puts prayer like Giselle's on the "What world are you living in, chick?" LIST!?

Children are starving, being tortured, abused, or even killed by their "parents" (in quotion marks because the biological ability to breed does not constitute being a parent by any means); millions upon millions of innocent people are fighting for their lives; millions are trying each day to live with mental illness and overcome addiction; and you seriously think GOD should waste any energy securing a victory for your husband during a football game????

So, to steal a line from the Rolling Stones, "You can't always get what you want...but you'll find sometimes...you get what you need."

Giselle, maybe God did answer your prayer. God gave you what you need! A reality check.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Newt Gingrich: Hypocrisy Problem--Another GOP Debate

OK...I have a life. I missed the last debate (well...I saw excerpts of it). Newt's performance highlighted a problem I've had with him from the beginning. He has a hypocrisy problem. He wagged his finger and was all for the Clinton witch hunt by Ken Starr that cost tax payers millions of dollars (I need the exact figure here), which turned up the Monica Lewinsky/Clinton affair instead of the supposedly illegal land deals of which they were accused of participating. During that time, he had the nerve to attack Clinton's lack of "family values" while he, himself, was having yet another affair. How does somebody have the audacity to do that?

In the debate, he smugly declared that Romney had investments in Fanny Mae and Freddy Mac while his retirement/investment plan also has money in those "mortgage" companies. (read sidebar below about investments...another tangent).

Just weeks ago, he complained about Romney's Super PAC's negative ads (see sidebar tangent below about that subject). He wasn't going to stoop to negative ads and Super PACs. I thought to myself, "That sounds very adult and grown up. Let's see if it will last." It turns out, he is now all for Super PACs as long as he has one that has the money to dole out negative ads. Hypocrisy? I think the definition fits.

As my late husband's favorite band sings, "Who Are You?" while I'm writing this, I think it is appropriate to ask that of Newt. You want me to believe you are a Washington outsider when you've made your living maximizing your Washington connections and living there for most of your adult life. You want me to believe  you are an historian, not a lobbyist, while you made money by advising congressional representatives for various companies that hired you. Who are you? You say you are a 68-year-old grandfather. OK...how does that make you qualified to run the country?

Be authentic! I know it's tempting in this era of spin and soundbites to feel like you have to be poser to gain acceptance by various groups. But this isn't junior high people! This is a job interview for the most important position in the world.

Sidebar Tangent 1: Investments.
Many of us have 401ks, and we pick investment "funds" in an attempt to make sure our money grows. It seems we didn't learn the lessons from Apartheid. I was in college when the anti-apartheid movement was in full swing. Students erected a shanty town in Dunn Meadow. Their presentation to the Indiana Univeristy Board of Directors was the first story I covered. As I remember it, I.U. had investments in companies in South Africa that promoted the status quo of treating whites and blacks differently in that country so the whites could retain power. Maybe we should go back to the old days where we don't pick "funds" and simply pick companies we believe in. Afterall, I've always said you know what matters to a person by how they spend their time and their money.

Sidebar Tangent 2: Money and Politics
We are a capitalist country. Is anyone surprised that the guy with the most money backing him wins? But of course there is a cost, isn't there? Let's just grow up and either accept it or change it. We have the technology. Here's how it goes: no more PACs or Super PACs. If you're a candidate, each donation is recorded on a website: the amount, the person's name, the person's occupation.

Since I believe there are few things that could possibly be this black and white, I'm trying to think of the problems this would cause. Right now, I can't think of any. Can you?

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Post 4: GOP debate in Florida. Be YOURSELF

OK...here I am in the middle...middle of the country (Midwest); middle class (that's a subject for another blog--have you noticed everyone thinks they are middle class?); middle in the political spectrum (of course the "right" thinks I'm a radical, feminazi, and I'm not sure what the left thinks...probaby "pro-business" confused moderate). I'm sorry. I digress. I'm trying to find a way to fit writing into my schedule so today it's the "morning strategy"....I've been up since 5:30, trying to get everything on my list finished before kids get up for school. My point? I'm a little foggy.
The debate last night? I fell asleep. Seriously, I fell asleep. My daughter was doing her homework in the living room where the main TV is located so I went into my bedroom to watch on the smaller TV. I'm not even sure when I fell asleep...I think I dosed in and out. From the tidbits I saw, here's what I think...just be YOURSELF. I think that's the appeal of Ron Paul. He comes off as truly authentic.

As for Newt, if you used your Speaker of the House experience and connections to work for drug companies to get the Medicare Prescription plan passed, just say so. Let's not split hairs about whether you were offically a lobbyist or not. "walks like a duck, talks like a duck"... I mean if you used your connections and relationships from government experience to affect legislation, aren't you in the role of a lobbyist who works for companies to get legislation passed or killed? Is there something inherently WRONG with being a lobbyist? Isn't it a decent way to make a living?  Instead of a lobbyist or consultant, he called himself an historian? WHAT? What company would actually hire an historian? It just smells funny.

But I liked Newt's answer explaining the presciption drug plan for Medicare...in the olde days, Medicare paid for the open heart surgery but didn't pay for the medication that could prevent the surgery (I think he talked about Lipitor). I would like him to extend this same argument to women's reproductive rights (welfare will pay for the woman to have the child but won't pay for birth control). Hmmm...a topic for another time.

Mitt...you were at your best when you said in one of the bizillion debates, (this is a paraphrase), "I'm not going to apologize for being financially successful." He also tried to explain how investment companies like Baine Capital (sp?) operate...they invest in companies...they take risks...some companies fail; some companies succeed; some companies get broken up and sold. That's business. If he didn't do anything immoral or illegal, what is there to be embarassed about?

BREAKING...Romney just released his taxes! They have it as breaking news. Here in the middle, I think right wing media will say we think it's bad that he made $40+ million dollars...as for "we" I mean me because if you're not radical right, that means your left. It seems they think "liberals" hate people who have money.  I certainly don't hate wealthy people. I don't begrudge people for being financially successful. However, it certainly highlights something that has happened in politics (the money has affected outcomes, it seems) and it highlights how the middle class is disappearing. It feels like the rich get richer and the poor get poorer and the middle class keeps getting squeezed.

I don't care how much money you made, I care HOW YOU MADE IT (I need to write a blog on that...I think it was my dad who talked about the sentiment throughout the Great Depression and WWII. Instead of being impressed by a person who had lots of money, one was suspicious of a person who had lots of money...either they were born with a "silver spoon in their mouth" which people didn't respect or they made the money illegally...bootlegging or something). During the last decade (actually since the 80s), it seems people are so quick to be impressed with people who appear to be wealthy (he drives a Porsche and has a summer home on Mackinaw Island...he must be doing well). No, maybe he has money, but he might not have done anything to earn that money OR he might have earned it legally but unethically (that's another blogpost waiting to be written...think of unscrupulous mortgage brokers).

Digression ALERT: I can't believe I'm going to post this without proofing, but the trash guy is coming so I need to get hopping. (For some reason, this is one of those things that just irks me about my husband dying...it seems so trivial but it's just one of those simplified 1950s role-definition that I liked...he did trash, any critters that tried to get in the house...spiders, mice, chipmunks...and I didn't have to worry about it).

About the tax thing with Romney. So, it appears his tax RATE was 14%. On the other hand, 14% of $40 million is alot of money and he chose to pay $7 million to charities, which is why his rate was lower I would guess. I think we all have the option to pay money to charities to decrease our tax rate. BUT I'm not a tax attorney (this is one of those areas in which I have not educated myself to keep up with tax laws, etc., so truly just an opinion). I just recall when Gary Hart talked abot a flat tax, people thought it was crazy. I don't think we will change the tax code because it would put an entire industry out of work (tax attorneys and accountants) if we kept it simple. I'm not saying a flat tax is the answer. It just seems it should be simplfied. Ahhhh...gotta go. I hear the trash truck!

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Post THREE: The Republican Debate in New Hampshire

OK...from the middle. Here's my synopsis.

Looks like they all received that Reagan commandment; "Thou shall not trash a fellow republican"...not an exact quote...but you get the idea. I was prepared for Gingrich to attack Romney  after all of those negative ads by some PAC that is allegedly is comprised of Romney's Wall Street buddies.

Romney was definitely the winner from what I saw here in the middle...Santorum tried to put him down by saying CEOs aren't leaders. Romney turned it around to make Rick look like a non-business guy who has been in Washington and maybe even lobbying too long.

Gingrich brought up Baine Capital (spelling?)...some company Romney led...but he didn't hit it home. He didn't explain it well enough for us to understand. What does it mean? Why should we care.

But nobody took on Romney.

Was Rick Perry there? He had the best hair of the  night, but he seemed absent and when he had the chance to say something he sucked up to the Christian right by saying he would stop the bigotry against Christians in this country...what? Isn't like 90% of this country Christian...or is that just here in the middle.

Santorum was the loser...I guess because he basically tied in Iowa (time and hard work pays off I guess as he visited every county in Iowa)...and he just seemed all over the place tonight. I can't even remember anything he said except being rude to Ron Paul when the buzzer went off accidentally. Rick Santorum said, "the buzzer went off because you're lying again" or something like that...it was muffled, which was even more annoying. If you're going to be snarky, go big...or don't go at all. One should never "half-ass" snarky!

When Santorum decided to perk up and take on Romney for real, it was about the distinction between middle class and middle income people..."We don't have classes in this country. I'm not going to play to that class warfare. If I'm the nominee, I won't allow the word class in the lexicon" I perked up because it was the most animated he had been all night and then he wastes my time by banning the word "class" from the lexicon!

And this whole anti-gay marriage thing. As I mentioned in my earlier post, I have no idea why we're focusing on this issue. I think it was Santorum who said something about heterosexual marriage being the institution that is central to our country's founding. What?

Gingrich was a loser because he is supposed to be such a great debater, and he seems intelligent and knowledgeable about a lot of issues, but just didn't have much substance tonight.

I heard more from Huntsman than I recall during this whole process. He made some sense but then started speaking Chinese (trying to hard to look smart...or pro-China...don't think they get to vote though). I agree with him that taking on China isn't as simple as Romney makes it sound when it comes to leveling the playing field. But here in the middle, Romney spoke to us by giving us a list of all the things China has been doing---all the things they have been doing to cheat! Stealing our patents, copying our products, hacking our computers, depressing the valuation of their currency (and he explained without making me feel stupid, why the currency thing matters).

Ron Paul always entertains. "Freedom is just another word for having nothing left to lose"....he just says what he thinks and it's kind of liberating. He has some good points and some shortcomings but I feel he really respects the Constitution and understands the connection between economic health and our country's national security.

As for our commentators, I thought the NH reporter did really well. George Stephanapoulous was good. I have always admired Diane Sawyer so much...what happened? Did someone tell her she had to act perky and silly and dumb? Am I the only one who thought that she appeared really ditzy and silly and then she went on and on about George Stephanapoulos doing the This Week show on Sunday. I'm all about trying to create the good ole girls network, but not at the expense of being honest. Maybe the botox they made her inject in her forehead affected her behavior. While on the botox, what did they do to Mary Matlin (spelling)...the lady who is married to Carvel. She's so botoxed up she has no expression. I can't understand the emotion behind what someone is saying if their muscles are so paralyzed by botox that they can't move their forehead.

I'm sorry this isn't a very scholarly review of the debate. I just wanted to type the stuff that came to my mind...sitting here in the middle. Now, I can listen to the news people for a couple days to see what I should have thought...ha ha.

Thanks for reading. What did you think about the debate?

Post TWO: Same Sex Marriage - Why won't we let gay people enter into a legal contract?

There was an interesting exchange on Facebook today about gay marriage. One of my FB friends posted a link from a speech the Governor of Washington gave about the issue http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJu6MA_wF7o&sns=fb

I was glad to read people’s thoughtful comments about the issue. I’ve copied the ones I like best below:
"My observation has been that for non-gay people, particularly for non-gay males, sexual differences are inherently perceived as inferior or even downright evil. Although I was a formal student of ethics, it took a long time before I really understood the difference between "not right for me" and "not right"--the difference between personal preference and the ethical thing to do. The understanding that having gay loved ones was no threat to my own feelings and preferences, is something that came only gradually."

About the speech, another friend said:
"I think this demonstrates what can happen when people work to change the hearts and minds of otherwise reasonable people who may struggle with this issue."
I remember years ago (circa 2003) when we got into one of those meaningful discussions after work about issues and politics (I miss those days). The subject was gay marriage and the idea of passing a constitutional amendment that banned same sex marriage.

I just couldn’t understand the position of the people who were so adamantly against allowing gay people to enter into the legal contract of marriage. One colleague, who described herself as devoutly Christian, became agitated and I kept asking her to explain her position.

She said something like, “It would make a mockery of my marriage.” I kept asking her how two gay people getting a marriage license from the state would make her marriage less important or less valid. I never got an answer.

To me, there are two parts to the institution of marriage: the legal part and the religious part. If a church doesn’t want to perform a marriage ceremony for gay people or doesn’t want to “recognize” that marriage, that’s one thing. But we have separation of church and state in this country (it’s a pretty big deal!) and not allowing gay people to enter into the legal contract of marriage has never made sense to me. It wasn’t too long ago when states had laws making it illegal for blacks and whites to marry each other.

Interestingly, my 11-year-old daughter, asked me this same question when we were watching the news. I think they were covering the issue when gay people were flocking to NY or Massachusetts to get married. She asked, “Why don’t people want gay people to be able to get married?” Instead of answering, I asked her why she thought they didn’t want gay people to be able to get married and she said, “Maybe they think it’s wrong to be gay or something, but they aren’t hurting anyone. They can’t help it they’re gay just like you can’t help it that you’re not gay.”
Whenever the subject comes up in conversation, I do my part to give my legal versus religious explanation and put the issue in context of how we used to have laws banning interracial marriage. It’s been met with less agitation and annoyance over the last year compared to that first conversation I had nearly 10 years ago—which leads me to believe we are evolving—or moving to the middle J as a society.

Until next time...

Blog ONE: Why am I here?

I heard a great song that describes this blog endeavor of mine perfectly. Kid Rock’s song entitled “I Can Care.” Here is an excerpt from the song, “I hear screaming on the left. Yelling on the right...while sitting in the middle, trying to live my life.” Kid Rock song with lyrics

There are a gazillion blogs out there…why did I start this one? I think I’m just weary of the disconnect about what’s really going on in the world.  To listen to the news or talk radio, one would conclude that the world is black and white, left  or right, good or bad. Fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, it’s not that simple. Most things are gray. Most of the world is in the middle.  We wake up each day, do our best to make a difference and be our best. Some days we succeed. Some days we fail.

A more selfish reason for starting this blog is to express myself. These are the issues I used to discuss with my husband—trying to understand issues, express my feelings, and make sense of it all. He died in a car accident and I find myself with no real outlet because some of these issues are the ones that they tell you NOT TO TALK ABOUT…religion, politics, and sex (not sure we’ll get into that last category).
And don’t worry about upsetting me with comments about your opinion or “how wrong-headed” I am…that’s the whole point. To hear what other people think, but more importantly “why” you think that.
So, here’s my take on a range of issues…from where I sit…in the middle

Friday, January 6, 2012

A World of silicone and Botox. Vain and shallow, or smart and necessary?

A segment on the Today show this morning prompted me to post this short story I wrote about cosmetic procedures. The segment was about the new wave/acceptance of seniors as models. The lead-in was about this spunky 90-year-old lady who is the face of MAC cosmetics. Then, they went to a 72-year-old model being interviewed by Anne Curry. I was all for the "concept" but as this model, Valerie Ramsey, smiled through her bleached white teeth as she talked about how it's the power of confidence and a positive outlook that defines beauty, I couldn't help but notice her "botoxed" forehead (if you watch the video...click on the link below...you'll notice how it doesn't move...look at her neck...it's a dead giveaway). Even the psychologist they used in the piece, Vivian Diller, was botoxed.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/46745179#46745179

I'm not saying its the botox that's a problem, necessarily, it's about being disingenuous. And Anne Curry didn't even ask the question we were all thinking, "So, have you had any work done?" Below is my take, here in the middle....

The value of plastic surgery
I always thought of plastic surgery as a way to level the playing field and correct some of nature’s errors…think the pictures of kids wth cleft pallets. The whole point is to fix something that nature messed up so that person wouldn’t stand out--so people could see what was important—what was on the inside. Or, to correct injuries from an accident or a fire so the person would blend in and look “normal” again. Then there was plastic surgery for the movie stars---the hideous face lifts to defy aging.

Enter the 90s…boob jobs and Botox abound. 

I remember one friend telling me she was so flat that having breast implants was simply a way to make her look more “normal.” Hmmm…that fit my plastic surgery argument. She really was flat and her surgery took her to a full  B cup…we’re not talking Dolly Parton breasts. Then, another friend had her breast enhancement surgery…using the same argument except it was because her breasts didn’t match her frame...huh(?) She came out a D cup even though she attempted to stuff herself into C cup bras for at least two years to rationalize the size of her breasts.

I remember  giving my feminazi (that was my late husband’s endearing term he had for me that he ripped off from Rush LimbaughJ) speech about using our brains and it’s what’s on the inside that counts. I proceeded with a  discussion about  ruining the curve. “You are changing what normal looks like.”

Indeed, that’s what happened. I recall watching a rerun of the 70s hit Charlie’s Angels one night as we were flipping through channels. The three most beautiful and revered women of the 70s were on a yacht  wearing their bikinis.  I was mentioning to my children how this was a popular show when I was growing up and my son said, “They look really weird.” I explained  those were the hair styles back then but soon realized that’s not what he meant. They looked like boys wearing bikinis. Indeed, I realized they did look weird. The silicone and saline implants had ruined the curve.

Fast forward to the turn of the century. Botox, a drug originally used to treat patients who suffered from spinal torticollis, was found to have an appealing effect of “freezing” the forehead and removing wrinkles. As the baby boomers aged, they took the bait. Botox parties, a quick injection at the derm’s office. Whoala…10 years of wrinkles gone!  How vain. How sad for these women to be so fixated on their appearance and trying to recoup their lost youth that they would pay $600 and endure the pain of injections to their face!!! Ick.

My Botox Experience
Then a funny thing happened. I had agreed to be a mystery shopper at a plastic surgeon’s office. I thought I was going for a consult and was to evaluate the check-in process, information I was given, helpfulness and demeanor of the staff.  Just about an hour before my appointment, I found out from the person who had arranged the mystery shop that I was actually supposed to get the Botox injection AND filler for my Parentheses (those are the lines on each side of our mouth) and throw in a lip injection too, if you want.

I was horrified. But I’m a pretty committed type. The ball was in motion and the person arranging the  project was a close friend. This was her career and I felt I needed to follow through. I bypassed the lip injection but went ahead with Botox and the filler.

It was uncomfortable. I still shiver when I think of the shot going into my forehead and my face (it’s not normal to let a sharp object penetrate such sensitive skin for a non-medical reason). But here’s what happened.

All the sudden people started asking me if I had gotten a new hair cut. Had I started working out? Had I lost weight?  I noticed everyone was so nice to me.  It’s like that commercial for juvaderm…everyone will notice but no one will know.  I confided to two of my friends about the mystery shop after they commented on how I great I looked.

So, here I am stuck in the middle. Is cosmetic surgery for the vain and the shallow or is it just the new normal?

And don't get me started on the teeth bleaching!  I'll save that for later!